Maybe this will work

john | Sept. 16, 2022, 1:08 a.m.

It's doubtful, since I feel the overall weight of it all at the current moment.  At least I got my dog, that little rat bastard.

I ponder what the point of any of this is.  Why do I at times feel the need to react or act in certain ways.  Being human I suppose.  The neurological sequence of events that cause one to do what ever it is they are doing.

Joy probably is somewhere in that.  Wow, it found its way to be written.  Although I guess when you are looking for it, it's easier to find.  Then again, from my understand that is not how it works with the opposite gender.  There, I guess it's simply a crap shoot.  They like you or they don't.  Simple as that.

But what do I know, I sit here with the company of a dog on this lonely night as I hear the thumping of the speakers vibrate through the building.  Ever so slowly ticking towards the future.

I feel different now, the darkness feels gone.  Now it just feels neutral.

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