Goodbye twitter you dirty cesspool

john | April 9, 2022, 4:46 p.m.

Well, its over.  Twitter is dead in my brain.  It all started when twitter was a wee little egg.  Then one day out of no where I was enjoying my life, and out it came.  Hatching Twitter.

I read it.  Great book.  At that point I became a fan.  I saw its little feather pop out.  Granted by the time I was using it or joined: what ever vernacular you want to use for the disgust; it was already a gargantuan cesspool of human fecal matter washed around a bird.  I loved it.

So I spent some time on it.  Smothering myself in crap.  Then I used it to connect with some people.  They did not respond.  Then people connected with me.  I didn't respond.  It was going like most my relationships, amazing.  It almost became a habit.  Not one I wanted, or even needed but probably should have, like all digital drugs.

Then as I was using it, twitter became mainstream.  A man in a developed nation was able to use it to tell people crazy things.  He yelled the loudest in the time square and for a brief moment, everyone cared about twitter.  Again.

Of course like most things, if it had just been left alone, it probably would still be in my daily routine of stupidity.  Because where else can I get outraged instantly at nothing, with no basis of fact or reality or even comedy.  Generally that only happens when I look in the mirror, but also twitter.

But finally the moment I never dreamt of happened.  Dorsey quit, for the second time.  Which is fine.  I feel when I looked at him in passing on a zoom call he was on, he probably already was intravenously injected with cess that he had reached zen and nirvana, and called them buddies.  They enlightened him with some wisdom "Quit while you still have humanity in you".

He was wise and heeded it. 

Then out of left field, Musk got high on his own supply and decided he also wanted to feel what Dorsey felt.  The closest things to the pits of hell that exist, caring about twitter.  So he bought a chunk, people praised it, and he started tweeting, got a board seat.  Bitched about people not using it, some one dresses him as a champion of free speech.  At which point, I slowly walked myself out of that biblical shenanigans, wrote this post.  And retired twitter. 

Like all retired people.  If I have to come out of retirement, I may.  But the end is near if not already over and now a rubble of maniacal laughter overtakes twitter.  The musk like cult is already starting to run rampant through twitter.

Speaking of cult like following, which are not the same as an actual cult, I would like to point out that the cult like following has nothing to do with Musk. He is in fact just a dude who probably never wanted a cult and got one.  Once he had one he decided he wanted to buy it instead of doing what most cult leaders do which is wield its power.  I can let your mind wander on that one.  But I know what his cult like is, as I have observed them in the wild jumping teslas. 

That Is enough for me to go by the wayside.  And like all those wiser men, women, children, and robots who came before me.  I too jumped off the plank to my twitter death in hopes its better outside.  Where the sun shines, and people when they argue with you, don't do it in a pseudo time square.  They do it like all people do, in the bedroom with some handcuffs and rope.  The rope has to be from a sex shop though.  Otherwise. its not waxy enough.