Waiting

john | Jan. 9, 2021, 5:37 a.m.

It is in a sense, what I must do.  Not for any specific purpose, but because it's out of my hands.  Although one would probably questions if it was ever really in my hands to begin with. 

This started over seven years ago.  Although I guess the specifics are a bit shaky. I do remember the moment.  I was there trying to save something and out of no where I saw it.  It was a short excerpt, a plea for help.

A person I will never know, wrote a piece of writing hoping it would help his case, that altered the direction of my life.  In a futile attempt to perhaps light spark to the dying flame that was this persons fight, I reached out.

He had either felt satisfied with what he had done, or had grown tired of what was the struggle to maintain life.  In both regards, I never heard back. 

He lost his fight.

I remember the day he lost the fight.  I noticed.  The signs where everywhere, a giant had fallen.  The earth trembled a bit.  The stakes now seemed higher, not because the giant fell, but because it showed just how far and long the fight had gone.

People reached out to me whom I hadn't spoken to in years to relay the news.  They wished me luck.  It's odd that day I was on people's minds.  I suppose maybe it showed to a select few how close I treaded near the same fate.

By this point I started to ponder if I had done the right decisions.  It seemed rational, heck maybe even logical.  This didn't matter, I continued on with the pursuit.

Now here I sit, moments away, waiting.  It's these moments that are excruciating.  They crawl by.  Not particularly for any notable reason, but simply because I am aware of what is to come.  It wont be anything spectacular, it will simply be poetic.

The rythm of the words will work like magic, the weight of them will squash the doubts, and the texture of their essence will lift the spirits of all those who feel slighted by them.  They will tell the story as it was seen, and make all those who understand what transcribed.

Unfortunately, for those words to be spoken the future must come.  It is unfortunate we don't remember the future.  Not that it would do us any good, since we'd probably feel an urgency to follow it anyways.